I wanted to talk about what experience and emotions that I had after being exactly one-month of blogging. Let me tell you, setting up a blog is never an easy process, in fact, it took me days before finally published my first blog post. The reason for that is because I was so much into having my own themes and actually this is the fourth one that I actually feel good about. When they said you can easily have your own blog in 15 minutes, yes that’s true but setting up a blog takes a lot of efforts especially when you learn everything by yourself without the help from an expert.
HERE A LITTLE STORY…
Before I started my blog, I challenge myself to keep writing for 2 months without stopping and I did it. Every day I woke up with so many ideas in my mind waiting to be written down on my laptop. As for right now after having my blog, I thought I can easily write like I used too. But then after reading a lot of blogs, I started to doubt myself. Comparison happened and my motivation just shifted away.
I started to have a hard time to write and questions start to build up. “Why their images look so good? Why their blog is so pretty? Their writing is amazing while I’m not.” I’m amazed at theirs while my blog is stranded by itself. I look down on my own blog and feeling bad about it just because it doesn’t look as stunning as them. Everything about my blog looks so wrong. Maybe some of you probably experience this especially when you just starting out. Here you can read more about the comparison that I wrote and how to deal with it.
CONFUSIONS AND QUESTIONS
Before proceeding my own I’ve probably searched about “blogging” hundreds or even thousands time and the main problem that I’m facing till now is finding my own niche. People said you have to find a proper niche and write what you know the most. Though it was probably the one of the hardest for me right now, not exactly know what my blog will lead me into. I feel there’s just so many things that I want to share.
As we are living in this media world full of competitions we tend to get out of track what our main goals are. I used to think oh, I wanted my blog to be my voice and if possible to help others. But after losing myself into focusing others, I forget about them. I know not all people wanted to hear your story as you think it will.
NOT EVERYONE WILL APPROVE
Someone told me my writing is more like an essay, even though I put so much effort into fixing my grammar and building sentences. It’s not an easy task for me especially English is not my first language as I mentioned in about me page. But once you have your platforms, it yours and why bothered about it right. You can share anything. That’s how I keep pushing myself ahead. There are people who care and there are those who are not too.
Even while I’m writing this I wonder whether it will turn out okay or not. However, this is what I feel after one month of blogging and I write it as a reminder to myself not to get caught up so much by what others are doing. Maybe some will said, one month is a just short period of time compared to years. But I feel so many emotions that I wanted to share as some might gone through the same as me.
STOP THE FEARS
Being self-conscious has always anchored me from doing something new. But now I want to train myself to be the one who motivates me the most. I know every learning take times, wanting to be perfect all the time is not going to happen. I need to start to go easy on myself and don’t be scared of failures, people judge anyway and they can say anything they want but I won’t let their talking turn into a reality. I want my dreams to be the one who navigates my path. It’s okay to start new things every day. Even if you try your best but it’s not working, next one will surely have improvement.
YOU”VE ACTUALLY IMPROVED!
I never feel regret to have my blog, in fact, I’m glad that I started last month. I know it was my fault all along to take all the negative energy, though it made me realize that I can have my freedom to do as I please even though people might say you have to do like this or that. But there are things that won’t work for me. I know that much, but the one who force it was me. Even if I’m not perfect with my blog yet, but every day I learn new things and why did I forget about that. Truthfully you don’t need to follow everyone advice, what feels right then it is. Think about yourself first, it’s not being selfish but if you try to please others while neglecting yourself, will you be able to help others?
I want to think even though it’s hard, but it’s fun and not letting my negative mindsets trap me into believing myself as a failure. You can do this! Keep posting and you will get better over time. This is YOU!
Psst…Let me tell you something amazing. This is the first post that I feel so great about! Today I created this and post it at the same time. I hope to keep consistent that way too. Thank you so much for being here!