Last week, I posted a blog post about this topic right here. Everything was unintentionally but I have the urge of wanting to know what other’s thought on their purposes. And the more comment I received, the more I realize, a lot of them yet to find theirs and that includes me. While reaching my twenties comes much sooner than I thought, I feel like the time is ticking more faster than I can count.
It’s amazing how growth can really impact a person’s view about life. Not everyone has the same definitions of life as it all varied especially we are living in a different environment, culture, religion and etc. But all of that lead back to my question about purposes. I was wondering about my own and constantly looking for answers. However, the more I look into it, the more questions started build up. Maybe I was pushing too hard on finding an answer right away, but now I seriously don’t think there’s something wrong about not knowing my exact purpose yet.
It keeps changing
Life is full of unexpected encounter and people continues to evolve, I believe I do too. For example, today I want to be a storyteller or a detective. Though, it might change tomorrow, a year or even ten years from now. Because every day we gain inspirations from others and our choices might shift its directions. Human influenced is really a big thing nowadays.
One thing I remember my sister told me,
“A lot of kids questioned about what they wanted to be when they grow up, but even us right now don’t even know what we wanted to do with life.”
I never thought of it but those words really an eye-opening for me and now it sticks with me. I guess, everyone will keep on searching and questioning what they can do in life until they finally found a secure sense of fulfillment to cover up the questions. Doesn’t matter what age you are, we just can’t stop this thought from coming and go. In fact, I have the tendency to stuff my head with different questions every day. Only this year I try my best to prevent them from overpowering my thoughts and I choose to take those question as a self-discovery.
I’m REALLY GRATEFUL for it.
To be able to have a platform to write anything, I really feel thankful to have the privilege of sharing my thoughts freely. However, I don’t wanna force my progress in blogging but let them develop slowly over time. Honestly, I still have no way knowing what it will lead me in life. But after joining in the community and having connections with others, it has improved my life unexpectedly. That’s why after receiving a lot of answers from the previous post, I wanted to serve a purpose where I can help others while still looking after myself. Because a lot of time I wanted to do the best for others but end up forgetting about my own needs. I guess you can say, that’s also one of my weaknesses that need to be improved.
Here I want to share a few bits of a bible verse from Matthew 22:39 that I have read recently and I think it’s a lovely quote that suitable for everyone.
“Love your neighbor as yourself.”
However, the way I define them might bring a different meaning to each person who is reading it. As for me, I felt the need to love myself more in order for me to give love to others. If I can look after myself, that’s when I can treat others the way I treat myself. But of course, understanding own self is not the same as knowing about others. But when you know how to cope with your emotions, it’s easier to help others who face the same situations.
Finding PURPOSE is a Journey.
That’s why I think my journey to find purpose means a journey to find Me first before anything else. And the only way to do that is from the help of our loving God. And I believe God allows me to keep on searching and release my full potential. Expressing love to myself, and just appreciate every blessing that God has offered to me. Even sometimes I feel worthless but God always has my back. I can lean on Him whenever I wanted.
You know, I really fancy the word “love” and I think it is one of the beautiful words that ever created. You can freely use them in your daily basis whether in actions or not. If you really focusing on this word “love” itself, it’s full of kindness, calmness, and goodness. You can list down every synonym word and still find the best ending. When you fill your life with love, everything will start to change.
Life is full of joy, and when I’m happy, that’s when I can pass them down easily to others. I really love doing it especially with a peal of big laughter in my day. However, some people do ask me why I laugh so loud. I know some people do get annoyed by my loud voice and that’s the harsh reality of life. People won’t accept you fully, but you are the only person who can accept yourself unconditionally. If laughing bring me joy, I think there’s nothing wrong to that.
But as a person who loves to laugh when anything triggered my happiness, I may not be the whole positive person especially when you read my other post that showing off my negativity. I have my moment of silence and holding back my tears too. I can’t even count how much I cry myself to bed. But I accept ME for being that way and I’m perfectly okay to have those moments too. Therefore, I chose to write them down in my journal or in this blog. I really feel that writing portrayed my emotions deeply. That’s why spending time reading other’s blog really enjoyable for me especially when those “Ohhh…I can relate to that” moment hits me.
Keep on Searching.
We can’t define life by only wondering. I think looking for life purposes exactly like collecting small puzzles. There are times when I feel those sparks saying ‘Yes, this is what I wanted to be!’ and sometimes it will end up with “meh…’. But the only thing you can do to find that small happiness is by bringing more positive in life, it’s already a starting point. At the end of the day, the reason why this questioned popped up was that I had no idea what will bring good to others. But I do know God always gives permission for me to embrace the process of finding my lost self while still enjoying the journey. I know my purpose might keep changing over time, but the good thing is I had options to either change it or add them to the list of my life’s purpose.
It’s interesting to know how much struggles we are facing every day and others can actually relate to me on certain things. I find it’s fascinating when two or three voices can support a single story. I may not be good with my writing yet, but it’s something that I really wanted to achieve in my life and one of my purposes is to encourage others through my writing. Even it means this small mind of my blog will reach to those who are in need.
Thank you so much for your kind comment on the previous blog post, I really appreciate your supports. I wish you the best in everything you do.
Don’t Give Up!